Forgiveness

I'm not really upset that I've seen a dream unfulfilled rather I'm upset that I placed so much emphasis on something that neither defines me or builds me up. I'm a competent member of society without it and I'm able to do great things in spite of it. So, what fueled my desire...pure vainglory.

I'm so glad I've decided to let God reign over my life. In one little moment of truth last night I was able to see the error in my judgement and gauge what was really important in life. What I need the most is to see myself doing what I love to do and there is nothing more that I love than music. I've been defeated by so many things and deterred by so much, but this time it has to be different. I cannot let someone else's lack of confidence in me cause a lack of confidence in myself. I know my purpose. I am sure that God placed me here for such a time as this to do what he has called me to do and I'm finally not afraid to embrace that. Thank God that he his the ruler of my life. I praise him for letting me see myself for who I am and for giving me peace to deal with the things that are to come. I believe in purpose and I believe that any door that closes is only preparing the way for an even larger one to open. I know that I am worthy of anything that I desire and even if I do not receive it, I am still worthy of it. Time is of the essence and I know that anything that I am willing to wait for will happen.

I am grateful for these last two years. I am grateful for the woman I've become and the friends I've made; bonds that will never be broken. Thanks to you all for not choosing me, and to God for choosing me on the cross over 2,000 years ago. I know people think I haven't found peace with this situation, but I can honestly say I have. God is real and his plan is as well. I prayed and asked for peace and he gave it to me. I am grateful.

And I'll be loving you always...

♥

Perfectly

"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."


I once heard someone say that they are not settling down until they find someone perfect. At the moment, I thought that was bizarre. Yet, now I agree. I'm not settling until I find someone perfect. Not perfect as in exact symmetry in their face, a personality that is suitable to all and a lack of flaws. What I mean is someone who I can look at in all their imperfections and truly see past them. I want someone who is perfect for me, not perfect for anyone else but me.

I want my ideal person. Even if he isn't exactly like I've dreamed him to be, I'm waiting for him. I want someone who will do all the silly relationship things with me like kiss in the rain, or go on random Saturday morning adventures with me or just sit up until 6 a.m. and watch the sun rise. It's corny, but I want it and I'm bound and determined to get it.

Love is a crazy thing. It doesn't happen when you want it and I've waited years just to find the one and I'll continue until I get my perfect ending.

...and I'll keep growing until I'm grown

♥

Goodmorning Dreams

It feels good to live like you think. I think I'm worthy of a lot. I think great things should happen to me. So, I'm living like they will.

I'm pretty much content right now. I'm trying to figure out a way to get this music thing back rolling. During Christmas break I did no music. I wanted to rest my voice and just give myself time to clear my head after that horrible semester. I also, was in a writing block. Luckily, I wrote two songs yesterday and I feel like the creativity is back!

I'm excited about 2009. I think it's going to be a good year. I'm teaching myself to worry less and trust more; to walk more in faith than in fear. I'm certain it will work.

I just wanted to give an update. Be on the lookout...Love.Live.Music will be released this year!

Keep checking back with me!

I love you all!!

♥ Semaj

I AM...

Probably not your average girl. I know that. People often misunderstand me and my motives. Yet, my reason for being is not necessarily for you and it is. See, I cannot make you understand the the things that aren't understandable. However, I can make the less understandable things more fathomable. Believe me, I'd like life to be easy too. It's not and then it is. It's like, kinda hard to comprehend. I'm not a doubter but I haven't proclaimed that I'm a believer either. I am definitely a dreamer, wish seeker. This life is easier than that one that's kind of hard. Takes more strength to tear your world apart. I've got heart. I do. Tell me who I am, no I'll tell you. I am that I because he that is breathes through me. It's the new me.

Here I am. 21 years into my life and wondering when does this start to come together. You know, the desires and the actualities. When does that start to mesh? I hope soon. I'm so ready for a release, a breakthrough. I'm ready for my destiny to be fulfilled or at least touched. I need to be rejuvenated because I'm easily loosing focus. I'm trying harder to get myself geared for this ride. It's not been easy so far and I know it won't get easier, but this is in me.

I was born to sing these songs, write these words. I'm just waiting for the day when the world will be able to hear this voice and that God can truly do the work that he started in me.

Pray for me.

Semaj
♥ .Live. ♪♪♪

Countdown

He's already loved me
In this world we've fallen already
He's held my hand and laughed at my jokes
This meet and greet are just motions we're going through
Stroking egos and having hope
I know he's the one, we've been here before
There's no need to meet the friends, I know he'll love mine and I'll love his
We've been here
We've walked down aisle in dresses and tuxedos
Gathered family and friends under tents and gazebos
We've bore children with our last name
Our. Because he gave me his last name, first thing
We've been here
No need to set up dates
No need to pretend we match, we do
We're in love, been there since day 2
I've been here
I'm going there
So I'm counting down to the beginning
Fast backwards, because somehow I ended up at the ending
Hello, you

Summer's Ending, My Career JUST Beginning

Talk about the favor of God! I cannot express how happy I am right now. I've not done everything He's asked of me, but THANK GOD he sees my heart. He knows how much I want this and He is making it happen.

Had to give him honor first!

So, guys I'm sure you've been wondering "What's going on with Semaj?" Or maybe not. LOL But I'm here to tell you anyway.

GREEEEEAAAAAAAT news!

The album is less than 4 songs away from being completed. I have not set a release date because I am still looking for someone to master the whole CD. My Dad is trying to find me someone great...like a guy who's mixed for Mary J. before. Gotta love connections. :-)


ALSO, yesterday a guy from myspace, whose done tracks for some people in the industry, decided to GIVE me TWO tracks for the album. I needed two more and he GIVES them to me! God is soooo great. It's crazy.


Lastly, an HU grad student asked my song "I Love You" to be featured in one of her films.
And CHECK THIS she wants to do a music video for the song FOR FREE! Can we say YAY! It's crazy.

I am so excited and feel so blessed right now. The funding for the album is here. Everything is falling into place. Guys, I really think this might happen. I'm so happy and cannot wait to share this with you all.

I'm proud of this album. I think I've written songs that will make you happy, make you think and make you dance :-). I pray you enjoy this.


LAS TWO THINGS:

I am trying to get a website up and running if ANYONE knows how to do this HELP ME! Give me a price list and I will go from there. email me @ semajmusicmail@yahoo.com Thanks!

Also, I NEEEEEEEED a band, but if not a band I need 3 dedicated background vocalist! I'm trying to book some shows in DC and definitely need some background vocalist! So, help me out. I don't know if any of the gigs will be paid, but if they are I will definitely compensate you. email me @ semajmusicmail@yahoo.com if you're interested.

Thanks again guys and KEEP praying for me. It's working. God is SO awesome. And honestly, even if things weren't going so great...I'd still be happy because He loves me and you guys are the BEST!

MUCH LOVE TO YOU ALL!!!

Semaj
Love.Live.Music

Trey Songz Show

Hey guys!

Day after the Trey Songz show--didn't even see Trey Songz because it was 2:00 a.m. by the time I performed. But hey...it was cool.

My management and team said the performance went well. I don't really know how I felt about it. I think I could have done better, but it was cool.

The Gadsden crowd wasn't like the DC crowd, so that's something I have to get used to. But I think they got into it.

Next week I'm on a show in Birmingham @ Club Bongo's at 5:00 on Sunday!!!


Well...that's it for now!

Much Love to you all.


Semaj
Love.Live.Music